Jokes for Topic: Female

A woman wrote on her facebook status... 'Husband chahiye ' 2 boys liked it and 140 women commented 'mera le jaa' 😂😂 That female wrote back 'kameenon maang nahin rahi..... poochh rahi hoon' 😂😂😂

सुबह एक महिला फल वाले से अंग्रेजी में फल मांग रही थी ये बोलकर – “Give me some destroyed husband” एक घंटा लगा यह समझने में कि वह “नाशपति ” मांग रही थी।😂😝😂

Wife: I am going out for a couple of hours............do you want anything ? Husband: that's all I want !! 😂😝🤣 😛😝

Teacher: What is the difference between the Egyptian Mummy and Indian Mummy Student: Kids are scared of Egyptian Mummy and Daddy's are scared of Indian Mummy.....😂😂😂

सावन में लड़कियां मंदिर जाती हैं, अच्छा वर मांगने के लिए, पर शादी शुदा औरतें क्या करने जाती हैं? शिकायत करने की हे भगवान क्या मांगा था और क्या दे दिया। 😣😮😨😥 😂😂😂

गुरू जी , मुझे बताईए मैं कैसे अपने अंदर झाँकूँ ? कैसे अपनी कमियाँ ढूँढूँ ? वत्स बहुत आसान है , शादी कर लो। तुम्हारी पत्नी न केवल तुम्हारी, बल्कि तुम्हारे पूरे ख़ानदान की कमियाँ इतनी बार गिनवाएगी कि तुम्हें याद हो जाएँगी । 😆😆😆😆

A Korean actress revealed that she eats only 3 spoons of rice everyday in order to be slim😂😂😂 Our Indian women eat those 3 spoons to check whether the lunch is properly cooked and ready to be served or not !! 😍🙏

मायावती एक टीवी इन्टरव्यू में बोली:- अगर मैं पद्मावती होती तो कभी जहर नहीं खाती….. 😡

तुरंत लालू ने ट्वीट किया :- ससूरी ! शक्ल देख अपनी😜,अगर तू पद्मावती होती तो खिलजी खुद ही जहर खा लेता😂🤣🤣

हर DP में बदली बदली सी शक्ल लगती है, उसकी गालीब…
साली लड़की ना हुई वो,
जैसे हुई ईच्छाधारी नागिन वो…

Jo dete hai ladki ko tohfe,
Wo late hai unki shaadi me sofe,

Jo jate hai unke piche,
Wo aate hai caro ke neeche,

Jo kehte hai JAANU,
Wahi bante hai baacho ke MAMU!!!

Ek padosan Ne Sunita Se Kaha:- are sunita gajab Ho Gaya.dekh to Pados Ki do Auraten teri Saas ki pitaai kar Rahi Hain.
Sunita padosan Ke Sath chat per Aayi Aur chhupkar pitaai Dekhane Lagi. padosan Ne Pucha, Aap Madad Karane Nahi Jayengi ?
Sunita - Nahi nahin do Hi bahot Hain

Coolest mom of the millenium Girl: mom,i want some fresh air..can i go for a walk..? Mom: yes,but tell your 'fresh air' to drop you home by 9 Pm...

Girl 1: Have You Ever Had A
Hot Passionate, Burning
Kiss . . . ? ?
.

.

.

.

Girl 2: I Did Once.
He'd Forgotten To Take
The Cigarette Out Of His
Mouth. . .

child-who's dat man & woman who come every night n disapear in morning?
grandma-thank god finaly u saw them.dey r ur parents..bothh r 'doctors'

Girl 1: Have You Ever Had A
Hot Passionate, Burning
Kiss . . . ? ?
.

.

.

.

Girl 2: I Did Once.
He'd Forgotten To Take
The Cigarette Out Of His
Mouth. . .

A woman telephoned her local newspaper to let them know that she had just given birth to 18 children.
The reporter didn't quite hear the message and said, 'Would you repeat that?'
'Not if I can help it,' replied the woman.

Lady: Is this my train?
Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady: Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master: No Madam, I’m afraid it’s too heavy.

A Girl Takes 100 Pics In A
Day and Deletes 99pictures.
One Picture
That Seems Better.
She Uploads and
Comments ? Aaise Hi
Bethi Thi Yar Kisi Ne Click Kar Li?

Wife:Apko pata hai mr.R apni patni ko kiss karke hi office jate hai,lekin apne kabhi ki. Husband:Chahta to mein bhi hu,lekin mr.R ki biwi nahi manegi

Ladki ptane kliye chupkese uske piche ja kr use drao agr vo hasi to samjho pat gai N agr gussa hui to jor-jor se chilao didi dar gai-didi dar gai...!!!Try this.

How do u CUT roads????? By LAUGHING..... Because 'Haste Haste Cut jaye Raste'

What do you call a female who never laughs? 'HASINA'

aik larki darzi ki dukan pa jati hai aur pochti hai, G yah galay miltay hain?
Darzi: waisay galay miltay tou nahi hain laykin ap kahti hain tou mil laytay hain.

Teacher:Bachon wada kro kabhi sharab,cigrette nahi piyo ge
Bachey:Nahi piyenge
Teacher:Girls ka peecha nai karoge
Bachey:Nahi karenge
Teacher:Unn par awaaze nai kaso ge
Bachey: nahi kasenge
Teacher:Watan par zindigi qurbaan karo ge
Bachey:Kardenge,aesi zindigi ka karna bhi kya hai..

Boy to girl in romantic mood'Mug sa Shadi karoo gi?'
She reply 'dakhee thi achi film hay'

Pars Chori Honey k Baad Larki Ka Reaction
Gareeb Larki : O Mere Pesay
Ameer Larki : O Mera Credit Card
Khubsurat Larki : O Shit Os Mein To Mere Boyfriend Ki Tasveer Thi.

Papa beti Se-Beti pehle to tum mujhe Papa kehti thi,Lekin ab tum mujhe DaD kehti ho,kyu? Beti-Oh DaD,PaPa kehne se Lipstic khrab ho jati hai. 'Ghor KalYug'...

Lady to Conductor: Bhai,Kitne Hrs. Bus Mein Rehte Ho? Conductor:24 Hrs. Lady: How? Cond:8Ghante Iss Bus Mein Baaki 16Ghante Biwi K Bus Mein.

Young girl goes 2 Dr wth mom. Girl-Medicl check up karana hai. Dr-sare kapde utar ke parde ke piche let jao. Girl-mera nai,mummy ka. Dr-Mataji aap jibh dikhaiye

1 aurat ne ishara krke tej a rhi bus ko roka
Driver:kaha jana h?
Aurat:Jana to khi nhi,
Bacha ro raha hai Zara bus ka horn poo_poo baja Do

Ek makhi ek ganje k sar par baithi.
Dusri makhi-wah kya ghar dhundha hai.
Pahli makhi-ghar kahan re,pagli abhi to sirf plot kharida hai

Way may be difficult,full of trials,sorrows pains,but if u fall down,just standup straight,be confident & say..bhenchod.dhaka kisne maara??